This post doesn't have much to do with my future service with Peace Corps/Madagascar. I've been a fan of Ryan Adams now for almost 5 years, and his music has become almost the theme to my ups and downs of life in North Carolina. He's such an up and down kind of writer; one minute he's mad in love with the most beautiful woman in the world, the next he celebrates his freedom from her chains, one minute he's so sad to leave his home and everything that he has there, the next minute he's rocking to the wild and exciting lifestyle of the unknown road. The past 5 years have brought about some of the biggest changes for me personally than I've ever experienced. Going to college, finding myself, realizing that that's impossible because "myself" is an ever changing spirit, losing everything that was normal and embracing the new normal with great fear and excitement, new friends, new loves, new hates, new music, creating music. And experiencing some the best 5 years of life one could ever ask to experience. And, during the same time, receiving some the deepest scars. Scars, not wounds. Everything heals with love and time.
Music is who we are. It brings us home. It takes us away. It loves. It hates. It laughs, cries, dances, prays, and curses. A song can bring us back to who we were the first time we heard it. A song can remind us of how far we've come, who we've known, and what we've done. They are milestones that, though they stick to the time we first came to know them, we forever carry them. Through our times of insane love to our times of sick hate, the music that surrounds us will forever be a companion that, whether we like it or not, will always tell our story.
"Moving like a fog on the Cumberland River, I was leaving on the Delta Queen
I wasn't ready to go, I'm never ready to go
Twenty-seven years and nothing but failures
And promises that I couldn't keep, Oh Lord
I wasn't ready to go, I'm never ready to go
Let it ride, let it ride easy down the road
Let it take away all of the darkness
Let it ride, let it rock me in the arms of strangers, angels
Until it brings me home
Let it ride, let it roll, let it go
Loaded like a sailor, tumbling off the ferry boat
I was at the bar till three, oh lord
I wasn't ready to go, I'm never ready to go
Tennessee's a brother to my sister Carolina
Where they're gonna bury me
I ain't ready to go, I'm never ready to go
Let it ride, let it ride easy down the road
Let it take away all of this darkness
Let it rock me in the arms of strangers, angels
Until it brings me home
Let it ride, let it roll, let it go
"Oh my sweet Carolina, what compels me to go? Oh my sweet disposition, may you one day carry me home"
I accept my post to Madagascar with my whole heart. I leave behind everything I love with hope and an open heart for everything in the world that I may come to love. As the song says, "Tennessee's a brother to my sister Carolina". Home is family. Home is friends. Home is love.
Here's to new love, new family, new friends, and a grand adventure. Here's thinking of you Huck Finn.
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